Fridays are typically the day I recap the Happy Things from the week. This week my heart just wasn’t in it. Sometimes I get tired of putting on a happy face, even on my blog. Do you ever get that way? If I had to be honest, I’ve been struggling for awhile. Some I’ve shared here in bits and pieces, but most I haven’t as I’m pretty private person. In a nutshell, my migraines are now interfering with my new job. So much in fact that I have another (yes, another) meeting with HR tomorrow (Friday, as I’m writing this on Thursday night). Please pray. I can’t afford to lose this job. I’m on detox diet (gluten-free, dairy-free, low-caffeine, low-sugar, etc) now to hopefully help some of it. But I’m on tons of medication already but I hope this new doc can find the root of the problem.
I just want to feel “normal” again. I struggle with that. What is normal? Is this normal now? If so, can I pretend that everything I was doing everything before is something that I’m still capable of doing? If that’s the case, what can I do that still brings in income? I’d love not to work full-time and do something in non-profit. I don’t know. This all of course depends on my health. But at the same time, I have to be thankful that I can get to work at all, as I know some people who can’t at all.
A friend send me these verses the other day as a helpful reminder:
II Chronicles 16:9 For the eyes of the Lord move to and fro throughout the earth that He may strongly support those whose heart is completely His.
Isaiah 41:10 Do not fear, for I am with you; do not look anxiously about you, for I am you God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.
I don’t know. I rambled on a lot, I understand. There’s so much going on inside my head but I wanted to let you know a little more about me.
I’ll tell you one thing that always makes me smile though – pictures of my sweet baby niece.
Images from my brother and cannot be used without permission.
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11 comments
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Allyson says:
March 10, 2011 at 11:08 pm (UTC -4 )
Thank you for those uplifting passages!
Be well. :]
Allyson´s last [type] ..My 100th Blog PETA
Terri says:
March 10, 2011 at 11:14 pm (UTC -4 )
Lori – I’m sending a big, giant hug your way. I hope you can get to the bottom of your migraines. I suffered from them for awhile and I know how debilitating they can be. Hang in there… and remember those Bible verses… they are such beautiful reminders. Lean on your friends if you need to… that’s what we’re all here for!
<3 <3 I'll say a prayer for you tonight. <3 <3
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Brigitte says:
March 10, 2011 at 11:18 pm (UTC -4 )
Hey sweetie. I have a good friend who has cluster headaches. Until she was diagnosed, she thought she had migraines, too. Apparently cluster headaches are like migraines but they last longer and feel worse.
If you want, I’ll ask her if she has any advice based on her experience.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Keep on, friend.
Katie Baba-Nielson says:
March 11, 2011 at 8:26 am (UTC -4 )
sweet lori, i am so sorry for your migraines. i will pray for healing. i know that physical pain can bring you way down emotionally (from my back problems. yuck.) i know you know this already, but maybe it will help to hear it: God can heal you. and he can use this hard time to teach you something that may help you help others someday. i’m so glad you shared this and will be praying for you today with your meeting. keep me posted.
love, katie
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Aunt B says:
March 11, 2011 at 10:04 am (UTC -4 )
Darling girl ,
As you know I’ve had them sense I was nine years old . I really dont have advise there really isnt much to give . Just keep going dont let them defeat you .I know the pain of them well . My breaking point with them was one night after having so many , I couldn’t take it any more . I went into my bedroom got out my husbands gun , looked at it . knew I couldnt pull the trigger myself , brought the gun out to him and begged him to kill me .. After long hours of us hugging and talking , this is when I said ok They are controling me I have to control them in a sense . I said yes I have them , They hurt extreemly , but never never let them think I will end my life over them or let them have that power over me again .. Hopefully , the medical feild can keep researching to find help for them . They trying . till then we keep going .. Do what you can to ease the pain .dont let the infulance of loosing your job over them cause you to have more , what will be will be , worring and being afraid will only bring more apon your self .. So Darling my thoughts are this , keep going , I’m with you 100% , I’m always at the other end of a phone if you need me . Love you greatly , and praying for you with all my heart ..Love always Aunt B
Betsi says:
March 11, 2011 at 12:16 pm (UTC -4 )
Just want to ‘ditto’ Barbie’s advice, sweetie! You know how I struggled with health issues for years, but if I had given up, I would have missed so much! You know you always have a home to come home to and support from so many others that love you and Barney. Have they ever considered a pain management consultant to talk to? Just keep those verses in your heart and Know that He loves you and will carry you through whatever comes. Love you, Mom
ilene says:
March 11, 2011 at 12:21 pm (UTC -4 )
girl, i’m praying for you
hugs!!!!
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Anna says:
March 11, 2011 at 1:22 pm (UTC -4 )
Hi Lori,
I am so sorry to hear your migraines are interfering in your work. I used to have them before. What helped me was to take the stress out of my life. At that time, I had 2 jobs and going to school part-time. I ended up quitting one job and my migraines never came back. Also, at the same time, I enrolled in a migraine study where they gave me the study drugs and that helped a lot too.
Just remember a job is not all about the money. If you want to go to the non-profit side, then do it if it will help your health.
Sarah says:
March 11, 2011 at 5:24 pm (UTC -4 )
I’ve never had a migraine before but I hear they are killer! I can’t imagine living with them on a daily basis…. I’ll be praying that they won’t cost you your job and that the doctor can get to the bottom of it all! Hang in there sweetie!!!!!
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Sandy a la Mode says:
March 11, 2011 at 11:28 pm (UTC -4 )
awww lori!! i am soo sorry to hear you are going thru so much pain right now and it’s even interfering with work!! i am constantly thinking about you and hoping you get better soon!! thanks for sharing this very real side of you!!
Elisse says:
March 17, 2011 at 1:08 am (UTC -4 )
Thanks for your honesty in this post, Lori
It’s great being cheerful, positive and fun in most of our blog posts, but posts like these ground us and our readers of the daily challenges that make our life unique.
Hope things start turning around for your health – and hope your move went well too!
xoxo – Elisse
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The Real Me…Part 2 | says:
March 21, 2011 at 11:58 pm (UTC -4 )
[...] last week was a long week – health wise and work wise. I wanted to follow-up here since “The Real Me” was my last post. I told you I had a meeting with HR and I my boss. I was concerned about the [...]